Taking Names and Wrecking Balls!!!

*sigh* You win some, you lose some, and today... I lost some. But that's okay because it was AWESOME!! Spain and France and I were all out painting mein Museum of Awesome when the wrecking ball showed up and needless to say I wasn't going to give it up without a fight! Mr. High-And-Mighty Foreman came over and told us we had to leave. That's when I told him that  he had to leave because he was trespassing on mein awesomeness! Kesesese~! But when he said that they were going to tear down mein Museum, let's just say, I didn't throw the first punch. No matter what that foreman guy says, it wasn't me! So the police showed up and carried me and Spain off to jail. I have no idea what happened to France... So I'm on mein smart phone (I told them I didn't have mein phone with me so don't tell them!) in mein cell, waiting for mein Bruder who was supposed to be here an hour ago to bail me out. Stupid West must have gotten lost again. He can never seem to find the jail without me being in the car with him. It usually takes him hours to get here... Reality check, if you sit on a metal bench long enough your a$$ falls asleep and that foreman can punch really f*cking hard!! At least I got a good picture of me and mein friends before the police showed up! Kesesese~!

I'm So Awesome I Surprise Even Me!

Hallo! I AM AWESOME!! Today was so freaking awesome! I was painting mein Museum of Awesome with mein friends France and Spain when I realized something... I'm a freaking artist! I don't know why I never noticed this before!! I was painting the wall on the side of the building really fast just trying to get done quick, when I looked up and there it was! The most awesome piece of art work I have ever seen! I should have done this a long time ago! Kesesese~! Reality check, I AM SO FREAKING AWESOME!!!

Museum Of AWESOME!!!

Guten Tag! I can't tell you how confused I am as to how mein Bruder could be so LAME! I mean, you'd think he'd be at least a little bit awesome because I'm his big Bruder. But I am here to tell you that that is not the case! Can you believe that he got mad at me today just because I bought an old building downtown? I told him that I was going to turn it into the Museum of Awesome where I could put all mein awesome stuff from way back to show everyone that I have been AWESOME forever. I'd charge people to go in so it's like the building would pay for itself anyway! The person I bought it from tried to talk me out of it by saying, "But it's condemned!" It looked fine to me! Just wait, West'll be so jealous of mein awesome Museum of Awesome, I'll make him wish that he hadn't called me an idiot! He'll feel like a total Dummkopf when I refuse him entrance to see the awesomeness within! Ah man, it's going to look so cool when I finish painting it too! I AM SO AWESOME!!! ... though, I might need some help... Reality check, it takes more than one guy to paint a three story building. Maybe I can recruit Spain and France to help! Kesesesese~!

I Went On A Walk Today!

Hallo, hallo! I had an awesome day today! I actually went for a walk because it was just so nice out! Gilbird was quite happy about it too. I went down to the river and looked out at all the birds that were returning after the long winter. I could hear the wind in the trees and the rippling, rushing sound of the river. Everything felt so peaceful. That's when I thought to myself, "It's way too damn quiet!" I mean, the sun felt nice, but geez! Why does nature have to be so lame?! So, I went home and played music really loud in mein room for a couple hours to make up for the time I spent outside. I had just decided that I'd been listening to music long enough when West flipped the breaker to mein room. Apparently he was shouting at me to turn it down but the music was so loud it was drowning out his voice. Mein bad! Kesesese~!

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I want to tell you all something that has been weighing on mein mind lately. I am awesome, mein little Gilbird is awesome, mein life is awesome, everything that is 'me' is awesome. *sigh* Being awesome is the best! But it's just too bad no one else knows how this feels. No really, sometimes I feel bad because I know no one else will ever be as awesome as I am. It's actually quite sad. But it is a reality I have grown to accept over the years. I AM AWESOME!!! Reality check, being awesome is a full time job but I awesomely accept the challenge! Kesesesese~!

AUSTRIA'S A LOSER!!! Kesesese~!

Tag everybody! I AM AWESOME!!! Today, I saw that loser Austria at the vet when West and I went to pick up his dog. Who else out there didn't know that Austria had a pet? But apparently he does. He has a hamster! How lame! I knew that guy was a loser! He named it Franz Liszt and he took him to the vet because he isn't running in his wheel and can't figure out why! So, I tried to say hallo to the little guy but Austria wouldn't let me near him. He said, "Get away! You'll scare him to death with your awesome!" kesesese~! I didn't make that up, that's what he said. Turns out his hamster's leg was broken! It made me laugh because of how ironic it was that I broke West's dog's leg on almost the same day!....oh no! West is coming!! I didn't do it West, I swear! West? WEST!!! NEIN!!!;al sihtp  akf  fksd....... a;sfi...
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In case anyone was wondering what just happened... Apparently I talk while I type I should stop doing that and West heard me and hit me several times with mein keyboard. Reality check, you can bruise mein face but you cannot bruise mein AWESOME! And also, West can hear through walls... I'll feel better once I get meinself a beer! Kesesesese~!

IT WASN'T ME!! kesesese~!

Was oben ist, Leute! I had another AWESOME day! We had to take West's dog to the vet because someone (not me) accidentally kicked it off the back porch because it wouldn't stop barking! The stupid thing fell and broke it's leg so now West is having to pay for it to be mended! This whole thing could have been avoided if West had taught his dumb dog how to keep it's mouth shut. Anyway, I finished work early today and ended up having more time to write in mein blog! So I wrote an awesome poem for mein Bruder! Ehem...

'Roses are red

Violets are blue

No matter how hard you try

I'll always be more awesome than you!

Also, I didn't kick your dog and break its leg.' ~ Awesome Prussia

West says mein poem sucks but I think he's just brooding because he can't prove that I'm the one who kicked his dog. Reality check, I am innocent until proven guilty!! Kesesesese~! I AM AWESOME!!

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I AM NOT BLIND!

Hallo everyone! I'm sure you are interested in knowing how mein day was. IT WAS AWESOME!! Same as usual. Nothing new to report except that I fell off a cliff. Well, I ALMOST fell off a cliff. West grabbed me and pulled me back up. I told him that I did it on purpose and then walked away laughing. He felt like an idiot, I could see it on his not-awesome face! He knows I am awesome and will never question mein eyesight again! I even took a picture to share the moment with you all! Here's a reality check, little Bruder! I AM AWESOME!!! Keseseses~!